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Dealing with rumination according to the Word
What do you do when you feel hurt by someone else’s words or choices? Do you run through the list of all the times you’ve been disappointed by them and have been offended? Do you find yourself ruminating on the pain and who caused it?
I found this definition of RUMINATION on VeryWell.com:
“Rumination involves repetitive and passive thoughts focused on the causes and effects of a person’s distress. The problem is that these negative thoughts don’t lead to solutions.
“We often slip into this type of thinking when we’re faced with a problem we want to solve. They tend to creep in when we’re stressed or dealing with something overwhelming. Instead of inspiring us to engage in active coping mechanisms or problem-solving strategies to relieve distress and improve mood, we often get stuck in a negative, self-sabotaging loop.”
Don’t think you’re alone if you are dealing with “thought loops” involving how poorly someone or an organization has treated you. Join the club! This is common to all people.
The trick is to DISCERN when you are running like a frenetic hamster through this negative loop…especially when your thoughts are focused on how evil someone else is.
This is what I’ve had to deal with time and again. Step one is to RECOGNIZE the thought loop you’ve been caught up in. You’ve got to SEE it before you can DEAL with it.
Then, as a person of faith, you need to EXPOSE the loop openly to both yourself and to God. Talk to Him about it. It’s OK to acknowledge the negative thoughts and feelings that have overwhelmed you. He knows all of it anyway. Let it all out before the Lord–the good, the bad, and the ugly. As you are doing so, there’s a good chance He will shed some light on the situation…and soften your ability to receive further help from Him. After all, the “devilish” goal of negative thought loops is to HARDEN your heart against others, both emotionally and in your thought processes.
Next, if you haven’t done so yet, ask for His grace to forgive. Now, I have come to the conclusion that when I feel hurt by someone, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they TRULY wronged me. So often we get offended by others when they never MEANT to harm us. IMPORTANT: Other people are not always operating under the evil motives that we, in our woundedness, assign to them. Nonetheless, you MUST forgive them, whether they MEANT to hurt you or not. This is KEY to your FREEDOM from the loop.
If you, like I have, find your thoughts going back to the hamster loop of negative thoughts even after initial forgiveness, understand that this is par for the course for us earthlings…even those of us who have placed our faith in Jesus and His mighty forgiveness. Just put the brakes back on that loop and reassert your forgiveness…and do so as long as those thoughts try to loop in your brain. Be persistent. Your mental health and peace will thank you.
Next, when you deal with stopping the negative thought loop by taking it to the Lord and forgiving those who have offended you (whether they did so on purpose or not), it’s time to BLESS them before God. This part is crucial as well.
How do you bless such people when the thought of them brings pain and exposes the deep woundedness you have felt? Isn’t it better (you may think) to expose their error and call out to God for judgment on them? Not so fast, Friend!
Jesus said, “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you” Luke 6:28. Paul wrote in Romans 12:14, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.”
After I go to the Lord, pour out my heart, forgive the one(s) who have caused distress for me (while recognizing that the individual(s) may not have intended to hurt me or target me at all), I dive into the BLESSING zone. I acknowledge how much God loves them, that He has a plan for their life, and that I CHOOSE to agree with Him that His plan for them is GOOD. I speak that out with as much faith as I can muster over them. I WANT them to be blessed and to have God move in their lives according to His purpose. I CAN pray this because as Romans 5:5 states, I have the love of God poured out in my heart through the Holy Spirit who was given to me.
But, you may insist, THEY DID ME WRONG! They DESERVE to suffer for their actions!
This very well may be true! BLESSING someone before God does NOT exempt them from His judgment; it actually PREPARES their heart for His CORRECTION in the most effective and merciful way for them to receive! As you BLESS them before God, you clear the pathway for whatever He needs to do to so that LIGHT will enter their minds and hearts, enabling them to see their need for correction, adjustment, repentance and bringing them to the feet of Jesus. If you cry out for SOULS, this is imperative as you pray, both for those who don’t know Jesus as Lord yet, AND for those who DO. THIS is how God manifests Himself to the various souls for whom you pray!
One of the best benefits of BLESSING those who have hurt you is the empowering grace that will rise up within you…especially as you persist. Oh, the hamster loop of negative thoughts will find its way back to you “for a more opportune time” (Luke 4:13), but this will be your chance to step on the brakes once again, forgive, and bless! It’s really that simple.
You may wonder, like I have, “What if someone REFUSES the kindness of the Lord, leading to repentance?” (Romans 2:4) This is where you continue to lean hard on the God who loves you and who will cause ALL things to work together for your good (Romans 8:28). Vindication belongs to HIM, not to you. HE will repay as He sees fit. YOU simply press into His mighty love for you and continue on the path of forgiveness and blessing He has laid out for you.
There are occasions in which God will LEAD you to confront someone and speak to them concerning the wrong you have seen or experienced at their hand. Do so prayerfully and under the direction of His wisdom. Whether or not they apologize and repent is between them and the Lord. If He leads you to confrontation, it is because He wants to HELP them as well as you; saturate the “after-confrontation” time in prayer…forgiveness and blessing…as well.
You are ONLY obligated to obey GOD, not to obey how OTHERS think you should deal with offenses. Trust HIM, talk to HIM, pour out your heart before HIM, forgive before HIM, and BLESS before HIM. He will READILY come to your assistance and aid.
Blessings,
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2026
Read MoreBlessed when insulted?
“Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” Matthew 5:11-12
We don’t typically think of this as being blessed. But it is! 🥰
We all misunderstand others at times. As a result, our words can be harsh and vindictive. Others can misunderstand and misidentify OUR motives as well and be judgmental in their assessment of who we truly are.
The Lord was not unaware of this very human tendency of ours. That’s why He said that insults against you as a result of your walk with Him are actually a blessing…because the only One whose assessment of you that REALLY matters sits on an Eternal Throne, and He sees the hearts and motives of all and assesses all with righteous judgment.
Are you being corrected by someone? Take it to Him who judges all and learn what He would have you to say, do. and/or adjust—if anything—according to His assessment. Are you being insulted? Let Him handle it. He was insulted by souls far better at it than those who have chosen to turn on you. He knows why they do this, and He will deal with it one way or another—according to what HE sees fit, not you. If your name gets trampled, oh well! The Lord’s name was despised by many in His 3 years of ministry on earth and His name—especially now—is frequently turned into a curse and His life, death, and resurrection a mockery. But the Ancient of Days is not deterred. He will have His way even when it appears He will not. Count on it. Treasure that truth in your heart.
But please remember. Even though you may be insulted, mocked, shunned, whatever—know that your God LOVES the insulters, mockers, and shunners every bit as much as He loves you. He desires to correct them even as He wants to correct you—if allowed—so TRUST HIM when these things arise. He is a very present help in trouble. He is the Master of turning things—even ugly things—around for good to those who lean hard on Him and who desire to obey Him.
Remember. You will NOT stand before the throne of anyone on that Day but that of your God, the Father of the LORD Jesus Christ. And THEN you will give an account of yourself—and ONLY of yourself—before Him. His assessment—then AND now—is the ONLY assessment that truly matters. Ever.
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2026
Read MoreHis breakers and His waves
I saw something as I was worshipping during a prayer meeting at my church today. The lyrics we were singing at the moment were:
“Holy Spirit, You are welcome here, Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere…”
As I was caught up in the song, I “felt” the breakers of the Florida Gulf sweeping over me and the water was flooded with the brightness of daylight. As I tumbled over and over under the waves, I marveled at their beauty and cleansing power, and although I was not in control, I was not afraid.
Then I heard the phrase “Deep calleth unto deep” from Psalm 42:7, so I looked it up.
Deep calls to deep at the sound of Your waterfalls;
All Your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me.
The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime;
And His song will be with me in the night,
A prayer to the God of my life. Psalm 42:7-8, NASB
The thought came that breakers and waves break off jagged edges of rock and polish them.
If you feel as if life’s breakers and waves have been unrelenting, I believe that God is wanting to let you know something very important—something crucial—to help you:
He is doing a work in you. Do not be afraid. He is with you in the waves and He will not fail you or forsake you. He will bring you forth, a smooth, polished stone–a lively stone–treasured by Him and useful to Him in His work and His Kingdom.
…for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!] Hebrews 13:5b, Amplified Classic Bible
He is faithful,
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2026
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A little dissection of 2 John 8
“Watch yourselves, that you do not lose what we have accomplished, but that you may receive your full reward.” 2 John 8
God is forgiving…all the time. We are accountable to God…all the time. These two truths do not cancel out each other; they go together like hand in glove. If my hand is not in my glove in sub-zero temps, it freezes. The glove is still real. The glove is still accessible. It’s just dormant. Inanimate. Not giving warmth. It does nothing for me unless I put the glove on.
John is letting believers know that we ARE accountable to watch–weigh and carefully examine–our thoughts, motives, words, ways, and behaviors.
Why? So that none of us LOSE what has already been accomplished in our lives by the Lord and those who have helped us.
It strikes me that the word LOSE is the Greek word APOLLYMI which primarily means TO DESTROY. We LOSE what we destroy, whether we dismantle our character or our testimony through laziness, indifference, grudges, bitterness, disobedience, “doing it MY way”, whatever…DESTROYING is at the base of the word LOSE.
We all go through STRONG seasons in our relationship with the Lord, but I don’t think I’m the only Christian who has walked through some rather luke-warmish, less enthusiastic, or more standoffish seasons with my Savior.
But John tells us IF WE WATCH ourselves–just keep a checkup from the neck up and keep a guard over our hearts and ways–THEN we WILL RECEIVE a FULL REWARD.
This excited me: That word for RECEIVE doesn’t indicate a PERFECT track record! NO!! The Greek word John uses, APOLAMBANO, means “to take BACK, to take AGAIN, to RECOVER…and receive.” This shows me that John fully understood the ups and downs in so many of our lives.
In fact, he and his brother James were once called SONS OF THUNDER by Jesus because they wanted to call down fire on a group that didn’t follow the Lord! But later in his life, John was known as the Apostle of Love. Big Difference. John understood accountability. He also understood forgiveness.
No matter how up or down, in or out your walk with the Lord may have been, you have the right to RECOVER and TAKE BACK and RECEIVE a FULL REWARD.
How? Simply this: WATCH yourself. Simply begin–or begin AGAIN–the practice of weighing and judging your thoughts, motives, and ways by the Word of God and the still small voice of the Holy Spirit within you.
And the great thing is this…we believers ALL want an AWAKENING to GOD in our nation. THIS is how it will start. WITH YOU. WITH ME.
Blessings!
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2026
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Are you living like it’s Saturday?
[Here is some background on this entry I posted in 2018:
Eight years ago on the Saturday before Easter, it was a dark, rainy, gloomy day. My cat Gideon was in late-stage kidney disease, and his buddy Rowe wasn’t acting right; he’d fall down and yowl in pain from time to time. I knew something was wrong with him; I just didn’t know what. Then that Saturday before Easter, I found a full feline canine tooth on my kitchen floor. It was Rowe’s…which only kicked up my despair and foreboding to panic level.
It was in that very circumstance I wrote the following blog entry. I hope this speaks to you.]
Are you living like it’s Saturday?
For most of us, Saturday means this:
Projects. Pastimes. Parties. Plans. Playing.
Rest. Recreation. Recuperation. Recharging.
But once, a couple of thousand years ago, there was a Saturday unlike any other Saturday. That day, like every other Saturday before it and after it, was sandwiched between a Friday and a Sunday. But those two days (as you can imagine) were unlike any other Friday or Sunday before or after.
On that Friday a group of friends witnessed the vile, unjustified arrest of their Friend, a blatantly rigged trial, and a patently predetermined death verdict. They watched helplessly as their Friend was dragged away, flogged, and beaten beyond recognition.
The hope which permeated His every word burned in their own hearts, stoked by the power of His presence. He was the One. He was the Messiah; but here He was now, brutally cut down as they heaved Him high on the crossbeams, slamming His tormented body into place for all to see…to mock, to jeer…
Hope was fading. Joy had withered away. Their Friend, the One who had healed the sick and raised the dead, was gone. His lifeless body was laid in a tomb with a stone covering it so decay could finish its slow work unmolested.
It was Saturday. A numb, raw, gloomy Saturday.
Sunday had not yet arrived.
Now, you and I know what that particular Sunday had in store for His friends…for the world…and for you and me. We know of the pre-dawn rendezvous at the tomb; the rolled-away stone; the discarded burial ointments and herbs when once the strange salutation was spoken, “Why do you seek the Living among the dead? He is not here. He is risen.”
Now, we, like His friends of old, know Him. We have walked with Him and have talked with Him. We know He is risen, He is alive, and because of that, we know that we too are alive in Him.
But today I heard the Lord ask me, “Are you living like it’s Saturday?”
It jolted me. Was I? Was I, a friend of the crucified One, so saddened by losses and weighed down by the perplexities of life, living as if it were only Saturday? Was I living a pre-Sunday life?
I KNOW BETTER.
I had to come to terms with the Truth: It’s not Saturday anymore!
Jesus conquered death. He conquered sin. He conquered pain. He is the Way-Maker when there is no way; He is the Quiet in every storm; He is the Light that overcame darkness—and He is my God. He who crushed the serpent’s head and pulled me out of self-destruction can walk me through torrential winds or crashing waves to the other side—Safely. Unscathed. Strengthened in hope and in faith.
I’ve made up my mind. I refuse to live like it’s Saturday ever again. For me, it’s Sunday now.
Dorothy
“Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God…When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.” (Colossians 3:1, 4).
© 2018, Dorothy Frick; reposted 2026
Read MoreDespising the shame
I was reading about the atrocities being committed in Syria this past week by anti-Assad, radicalized members of the religion of peace. Sects such as Alawites, Druze, Kurds, Christians, and even non-radicalized Muslims have been slaughtered by the thousands. When I read about the hundreds of Alawite women being paraded nude through the streets—with the obvious intention to shame and degrade them—before they were unceremoniously executed, I found myself reeling in grief. And then, that Voice I’ve come to recognize said this, “I was naked when they crucified Me.”
If not one sparrow falls to the ground without His knowledge, then my heart takes hope thinking that He, who understood their dilemma more than any of us could, moved with compassion among those women, depositing grace, courage, and the hand of forgiveness and everlasting life to them. I believe that Death cannot win…not even in this.
As I was mulling these thoughts over, I was reminded of a section of Scripture I dove into years ago. It revolutionized my thinking about SHAME. Hebrews 12:1-2 opened my eyes to a nuance of Jesus’s death on the cross that I had never before realized.
Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, DESPISING THE SHAME, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2
Since the entire scope of these two verses is so huge and instructive, in honor of the women and others who have been martyred this week by Syrian jihadis, I will simply focus on the three words that reveal what occurred within Jesus during the excruciating ordeal surrounding His torture, mock trial, and execution by way of the cross—DESPISING THE SHAME.
As I have mentioned, the purpose of stripping these Syrian women naked was TO SHAME THEM. It was to make them FEEL SHAME about themselves. To make the last thoughts they had about themselves to be FILLED WITH SHAME—to THINK “I AM A SHAMEFUL PERSON.”
The same ploy was used on Jesus, believe it or not. How do I know? A quick read through Mark 15 in the New Testament gives several depictions of the mockery and shame-inducing methods used by the soldiers and others upon Jesus, including the final straw before nailing Him to the cross—stripping Him of His clothes, hence any dignity, and hanging Him publicly for all to see.
Now here’s where it gets interesting. When Hebrews 12 says that Jesus DESPISED THE SHAME, it does NOT imply that He felt squeamishly horrified about being embarrassed and humiliated; nor does it mean that the public degradation was so intense that He despised it; NO!!! That word, DESPISING, in the Greek, kataphroneō, actually means this: He “contemned, despised, disdained, thought little or nothing of” the shame being poured out upon Him. [from G2706 – kataphroneō – Strong’s Greek Lexicon (kjv)]
Let’s look at this definition a little more closely. The word “contemned” means that Jesus—while suffering through taunts and torments—treated and regarded all their attempts to personally shame Him with CONTEMPT! He DISDAINED their tactics to make Him feel bad about Himself—in other words, He KNEW that the mockery, the taunting, the torture, and the nakedness was absolutely unworthy of His consideration or respect. He “thought little of or NOTHING” of their determination to make Him feel as if He had blown it, and their strategies of shame NEVER fazed Him.
It is significant that during His entire passion, Jesus never felt ashamed of Himself. But this was the goal of those who targeted Him! Not only did the political and religious leaders want to terminate Jesus in every sense of the word, but they also wanted to so saturate the Man with imposed shame that no one would ever desire to be associated with Him or His “miserable” life again. Disposed! Done! Finished!
However, Jesus DID bear shame on the cross–but not His own. He bore your shame, my shame, and the shame—both earned and unearned—of the entire human race. Had the forces of darkness succeeded in causing Jesus to FEEL PERSONAL SHAME, He never would have been able to bear ours. Had He yielded for a second to personal shame (as planned by the enemy of our souls), His death would have been just that—one man’s humiliation and demise…and this sacrifice would have been made void.
But Jesus—Son of Man and Son of God—disdained and regarded as NOTHING their attempts to make Him ashamed of Himself! He had far bigger fish to fry! He thoroughly and effectively took on OUR SHAME! OUR SIN! And, as a result of His unequaled, excruciating yet marvelous sacrifice, He has made available full REDEMPTION for anyone and everyone who will believe. THIS is His Joy. And THIS is why He died that ignominious death for you and for me.
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2, Berean Standard Bible
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2025
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A Christmas crisis
I was facing a small-scale crisis on Christmas morning that could have become a HUGE crisis after the sun went down IF it had been left undealt with.
After talking with and praying with a couple of friends about it and learning that it would cost $600 for the appropriate company to just LOOK AT this issue on the holiday, let alone it would probably have to be left unrectified until the 26th anyway, I decided to just wait until the next day…even though that could put me in potential danger overnight.
I thought of another friend who has skill in various things mechanical and texted the situation. He said he could look at it in about an hour.
In the meantime, I worked at keeping my emotions in check. Although I did cry (at first tears of “why me?” and frustration); but then after reading an absolutely random scripture in a translation I am unfamiliar with, those tears turned to faith and trust and soon became tears of thankfulness and praise to God for His faithfulness.
You see, while I was waiting, I opened up the “Streams in the Desert” devotional online and started to read the Christmas Day entry (something I rarely do anymore).
The second scripture was a translation of Isaiah 9:6 that I had never read before…and it pierced my heart with a bullseye.
This is how Isaiah 9:6 reads in my familiar translation:
“For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us;
And the government will rest on His shoulders;
And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.” (NASB, 1995)
But online, the verse I saw was this: (heart-piercing bullseye in CAPS)
“For a child has been born to us, a son has been given to us. HE SHOULDERS RESPONSIBILITY AND IS CALLED: EXTRAORDINARY STRATEGIST, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” (NET Bible)
It dawned on me! He shoulders responsibility for ME–NOT just for the government–MY safety. MY help. MY life–IF I will simply trust Him to do so, obey Him, and love Him!
And it also hit me that this Wonderful Counselor we hear about at Christmas is 100% an EXTRAORDINARY STRATEGIST, brilliant in all things and kinder than the most patient earthly counselor. He KNOWS how to effectively strategize for MY situation…if I will simply trust Him to do so!
My mechanically shrewd friend arrived, fixed the issue in 40 or so minutes…and was on his way!
My Christmas Day (and night!) was rescued, and I now have a clearer understanding of my EXTRAORDINARY STRATEGIST God who SHOULDERS RESPONSIBILITY…not just for others, but for ME and ALL those who are willing to trust Him through the difficulties of life we all face.
What a remarkable Christmas gift from My Father…the knowing that He will shoulder responsibility and will be my Extraordinary Strategist throughout the remainder of my days!
Let me never forget! I hope you come to know Him in this way as well!
Dorothy
© Dorothy Frick, 2024
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